Supporting Good Divorce Week: Tips for a constructive separation

Each year, Resolution Good Divorce Week serves as a vital reminder that whilst divorce represents the end of a marriage, it need not be characterised by acrimony, conflict, or lasting damage to families. Resolution, the organisation representing over 6,500 family law professionals across England and Wales, established this annual initiative to promote a more constructive approach to relationship breakdown, emphasising the importance of reducing conflict and prioritising the wellbeing of all family members, particularly children.

The week represents more than simply a campaign; it embodies a fundamental shift in how we approach divorce proceedings. Rather than viewing separation as an adversarial battle, Resolution Good Divorce Week encourages couples to consider divorce as a process that, whilst undoubtedly difficult, can be managed with dignity, respect, and consideration for long-term consequences. This approach recognises that how couples navigate their separation often has far-reaching implications for their future co-parenting relationship, their children's emotional wellbeing, and their own ability to move forward constructively.

Central to achieving a good divorce are five fundamental principles that can transform what might otherwise be a destructive process into one of resolution and healing.

1. Work together, with effective communication and compromise

The introduction of the Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act 2020 (DDSA 2020) has facilitated a less adversarial approach to divorce by removing the need to assign blame. This legal framework encourages couples to work collaboratively and introduced the ability for parties to submit a joint application for divorce. This procedural change reflects the aim of the DDSA 2020 by attempting to reduce conflict and facilitating amicable resolutions.

Where appropriate to do so, we encourage parties to work together in this way to resolve disputes too, particularly those involving children. Effective communication allows parties to express their needs and concerns clearly, fostering mutual understanding and reducing the likelihood of conflict. Compromise, is then finding solutions that are a best fit for the whole family, based on understanding, rather than an adversarial approach to trying to ‘win’. This means working hard to find common ground and reach agreements that are in the best interests of all involved.

By working together in this way, couples can avoid the emotional and financial toll of protracted legal battles, paving the way for a smoother transition to post-divorce life. Where this is challenging, we recommend using legal professionals, possibly a joint legal service or mediation to assist.

2. Prioritise your children's needs

Family law in England and Wales places significant emphasis on the welfare of children during divorce proceedings. Under the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973 (MCA 1973), section 25(2)(b), the court's first consideration is the welfare of any minor children of the family who have not attained the age of 18. This legal standard underscores the importance of prioritising children's needs, including their emotional, educational, and financial well-being. Parents should strive to minimise conflict and ensure that their decisions during divorce proceedings are guided by the best interests of their children. We acknowledge that this isn’t always easy and it is often necessary to seek support in understanding the impact of decisions on your children and to be able to balance competing options. However, if everything is addressed through a child-focused lens, there is usually a ‘guiding star’ approach to all the conversations that helps facilitate a compromise.

3. Seek legal and emotional support

Divorce can be a complex and emotionally challenging process, particularly when issues such as parental rights, finances and other significant issues are involved. Seeking legal advice is essential to navigate these complexities and ensure that all legal requirements are met. Generally, early advice is always recommended so that it is possible to get a clear understanding of everything that needs to be considered and a realistic perspective on future outcomes. Additionally, emotional support from counsellors, therapists, or support groups can help individuals cope with the stress and emotional toll of divorce, enabling them to make more informed and rational decisions.

4. Manage your finances thoughtfully

Financial considerations are a critical aspect of divorce proceedings. The MCA 1973, section 25(2)(b), also requires courts to consider the financial needs, obligations, and responsibilities of both parties. This includes assessing income, assets, and future financial requirements. Thoughtful financial planning can help individuals secure their financial stability post-divorce and ensure that they can meet their obligations, including those related to their children. Often the financial planning is best done with specialist solicitors and financial advisors.

5. Practise self-care

The emotional and mental well-being of people going through and after divorce is crucial, not only for their own health but also for the welfare of their children. Research indicates that children of separated families are at a higher risk of experiencing poor outcomes, including behavioural problems and depressive symptoms. Parents who prioritise self-care can better support themselves and their children to create a stable and nurturing environment during this challenging time.

Resolution Good Divorce Week serves as a reminder of the importance of approaching divorce with a focus on minimising conflict and prioritising the well-being of all parties involved. We cannot always save marriages; however, we can certainly save families from unnecessary harm through thoughtful, compassionate, and well-informed approaches to separation. By following the top five tips, individuals can navigate the divorce process in a more constructive and amicable manner.

By following the Resolution guidelines, individuals can work towards achieving a "good divorce" that minimises harm and promotes positive outcomes for all involved. Here at Boyes Turner, all of our family law team are members of Resolution and we work hard to find the best outcomes for our clients and their families.